Social Intelligence

Social scientists are quite convinced that of all the types of intelligence we possess, the one most associated with life success is Emotional Intelligence (EQ) or social intelligence.  This is the ability to recognize that our behavior affects others around us and can account for how we are received in social situations.  It seems that we all know people who are highly intelligent, yet can't quite get along with other people.  In a simple analysis, these folks lack social intelligence.

This topic of social intelligence has been on my mind as I prepare for a training session I will be doing soon designed to look a bit deeper at the notion of social capital.  How do we learn "social intelligence?"  Most of us never take classes on this topic, yet, in preparing for life success, as measured through relationship success, social intelligence seems to be the key ingredient.

So I have begun to identify aspects related to social intelligence - or the behaviors that make us socially attractive to other people.  My lens for this task has been my own perspective in social discourse - what kind of person do I find to be socially attractive.  Here are a couple of the items I have chronicled.  As you review this list, let me know what items I might have missed.

*  Be nice to everyone you meet                *  Be positive, even in hard situations

*  Don't talk only about yourself                 *  Don't correct people in public

*  Never put others down                            *  Be the first to smile, say hello, shake hands

*  Always take the high road                       *  Never talk down to anyone

*  Never laugh at another's misfortune       *  Look as nice as possible, even in casual situations

These are but a few of a long list I have been assembling, but I wonder what you think about this topic.  What are the things that make people socially attractive to you?