Love on the Spectrum

Those of us interested in relationships and social capital know that there are essentially 3 qualitative levels of connections in our lives. The most superficial relationships are people we have an initial acquaintanceship with in our orbit. These might be neighbors, people we might see occasionally at work, and other folks around our lives. As we develop more regularity and find more similarity with people we move from the level of acquaintanceship to friendship. In this stage we begin to do things with these people and establish more of a social obligation to them. Finally, and probably most importantly, are the people we then fall in love with, which are often seen as “covenant” relationships. These are the most deeply bonded connections in our lives. It is this last stage that is the most challenging in managing our social capital, yet the one that is the most satisfying and emotionally rewarding.

Recently, at the urging of my daughter as well as friends who know my work, I was introduced to the Netflix series, titled: “Love on the Spectrum.” It is the production of Northern Pictures and is an Australian reality show featuring young men and women on the Autism Spectrum and their efforts at finding love. There are only 4 episodes, but the viewer is not only introduced to some fascinating people who are looking for love, but helps people understand some of the unique social aspects of the Autism Spectrum.

One interesting dimension, is that some of the highlighted folks are supported by Jodie, a “relationship coach,” who explores some of the key aspects necessary for relationship-building. Jodie helps to guide the person in not just finding similarities, but to allow the person’s broader aspects to come out.

My only critique is that “Love on the Spectrum” seems to suggest that persons on the Autism Spectrum can only build important relationships with others who might be on the Spectrum. That is never stated, but implied by the various levels of intervention. Of course I understand that a persons differences tend to bond them with others who have similar differences and this can happen all around the board. Still, the optimist in me hopes that we all can overcome some of the stereotypes and judgments we might have about that which makes us different from each other.

Still, “Love on the Spectrum” is an important series to examine. By highlighting the men and women in the show helps any of us to see the human side of all people.